Test Drive Unlimited 2 starts like a dream… turns into a potentially bland driving game (Test Drive Unlimited 2)

Test Drive Unlimited 2 starts off like a dream. No, really, it’s an actual dream sequence. It’s the life you’re supposed to be aspiring towards. Pool parties, fast cars, beautiful girlfriends who like to buy you fast cars… It’s like they looked into the minds of our teenaged selves and sellotaped those adolescent aspirations to a Blu-Ray disc. Check this out:

Above: Everyone’s getting down to some phat beats at your pool party. You get control in a sec…

Above: Which means you get to check out the ‘hotties’. There’s plenty of erm… physics modelling going on

Above: Uh-oh – it’s your girlfriend. She wants to talk to you. Maybe it’s about your lecherous ogling?

Above: No, she actually wants to give you a car. A Ferrari California, to be precise. Honestly, it’s like a dream

Above: You slide into the stitch-modelled driving seat and start the engine purring with a gentle squeeze of R2

Above: And away you go, out onto the open road. Clear skies, exotic foliage… This is surely too good to be true

Above: Ah, Ferrari, open road, glare from the setting sun, and not a single cop to make you check your speed

Above: Which invariably means you’re going to crash any second. Sure enough, over we go… You know, at this point it would be really nice if this wasn’t real. Oh, but what’s this? The screen’s fading out…

Above: Oh, it was just a dream! And that’s not your girlfriend at all. You’re a valet and it’s her car you’re in. This doesn’t look good

Above: Wake up, buddy. Time to get out and accept it. Your life sucks

Which is where the real game begins. The girl lets you drive her to a TV studio for some quick filming (where you find a picture of her on the wall, in exactly the same dress she’s wearing now – lolz etc), before some weird chap called Jude is greeted with the words ‘Hey, Jude!” (groan) and you’re allowed to buy a crappy car. And that’s when the game changes from a dream to… something a little less perfect.